another love song

They don't write songs like this anymore. This song makes want to sit by the window, with a cup of coffee or hot choco and emote hehehe :P

Friday I'm in Love

One of my favorite memories...singing this with you in the car while driving to Manila *sighs*

you're so vain, you probably think this entry's about you....

I miss those days when women are the only ones who are concerned about their waistlines. I am baffled by men who express their aim to lose inches around their waist. In the past, men work out to develop their muscles. They lift weights to have guns on their arms and to puff up their chests but never to achieve an hour glass figure...or if they did, they would never have blurted it out loud. I'm all for health and wellness but for a man to do it because Summer is fast approaching is just disturbing. What's scarier is that if they're now that vain and that concerned about their own figures how much more critical would they be of a woman's figure?


Early this year I had initially planned to go back to running, however, it hasn't been easy to drag myself out of bed in the morning. Let's see whether I'll finally be able to do it next week. Wish me luck!

too hot to handle

I don't think it's very obvious that I'm enjoying my new home. It's been a long time since I last wrote journal entries, three days in a row. I hope I can keep this up for a long time.

I mentioned in my previous entries that I intend to write about new things in here, however, I think I need to let the old things out first before I can successfully move on to new things. 

I think it's funny and kinda pathetic how I'm still convinced that although your apathy has left my heart broken several times these past couple of years, I am still convinced that you love me. I am also convinced that what's stopping you from letting it out is the fear of what other people would say about me. I'm not sure whether I'm flattering myself too much but I actually think that there are people who've already expressed their disapproval of the idea of "us." You know what sucks...these people claim to be my friends, even sisters, and that they're after our interest...but I just don't like being talked about behind my back. If there's something they want to know about me...they better ask me straight.

I don't blame you...I know I'm hard to handle...perhaps in the future...when you're strong enough and wise enough...maybe you'll be brave enough to take me...

har har har

You know what I think would be funny? It's when realize I that it is I who is driving you mad :P 'Won't be surprised though...

confession

I believe that the same time, last year, I was doing the exact same thing...obsessing over a Valentine's event I volunteered to organize for our church. I have to say I feel exactly the same way I felt then...I'm now in panic. A number of performers fell ill this past weekend, we're not sure whether people are actually interested in participating, as of now, everything that will happen, the different parts of the program are still in my head and I'm not quite sure as to how I will be able to articulate them and whether we will be able to pull them off...I know, I brought this to myself. This is what I get for being overeager. Please remind me to care less about Valentine's month next year.

I have to admit that two other reasons why I started this new blog is because I need a new hideout, since most of my friends, even family, already know about my other blogs, I need a new safe place. Another reason is that the green-eyed monster in me was awakened after stumbling upon the blog of the girl that the guy I like likes *sighs* I know, it's so juvenile...kinda pathetic for a woman in her 30's to react like this :P Don't get me wrong...I'm not trying to compete for attention, I think I've reached a point when it's already crystal clear to me that nothing will ever happen between me and that guy. I know that perhaps I'll always love him but not because I want to end up with him but simply because he's my brother (not blood brother I should specify.). I suppose I just want to start anew...start a blog where I'll no longer be writing about waiting for him to come to his senses...instead I can start a new blog where I'll be writing about myself, coming to my senses.

One thought that has been hovering above my head these past few weeks is that I need to learn to live with loneliness. There I finally said it. I have been trying not to say it for fear that saying it will make it real...but I have to get real. I have to recognize the fact that my family will not always be around for me...that although I still have hopes in finding someone who'll be my partner in life there is also the possibility that I may not find him...or perhaps if I do find him I'll eventually lose him...and in the end I'll once again find myself alone. I suppose it would be a good idea for me to learn how to live with the person I'm gonna have to live with for the rest of my life...myself:P

just moved in...

So this is my nth blog...I can compare my constant urge to start a new blog to my constant urge to start journals in different notebooks even if I haven't used up all their pages. There's something about starting on a clean slate. Well that doesn't mean I'm doing the same thing with my life...I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be writing about the same old things...but I suppose writing about them on a new blog would give me the illusion of growth and progress...hehehe! And besides, I suppose starting a new blog would be more eco-friendly than starting a new journal on a new notebook so I don't see anything wrong about starting this new blog :P

So I welcome myself and whoever has managed to find my new home in this world wide web :D